This weekend after my son’s bath he found a pair of my husband’s boots and put them on. He is running around the living room in his underwear and hip boots. I grab the camera and snap a couple of pictures. Later in the week my husband asked if I had downloaded the pictures yet. Of course I hadn’t. So I am doing it now. 774 pictures on my camera! Holy Cow! That is since last March. Plus, I got another camera for Christmas. I didn’t like dragging the big camera to the zoo, park, etc. so I got a smaller, cheaper one for keeping in my purse. Let’s see another 186 on that one.

Digital cameras are great. You don’t have to worry about wasting film. But I have no idea when I got any printed last. There are some that are printed in a photo box. But then there have been many printed since then that are in various places throughout the house. I pride myself on trying to be an organized person but in this area I feel woefully short.

Granted the pictures are downloaded to my computer at work (I know, very wrong but it is where I spend most of my waking hours) and my computer at home and backed up on a jump drive. And they are organized into folders for each event. But I still feel very behind. I started making him a scrapbook when he was little but when he started crawling and getting into what I was working on, I had to put that aside. Granted I am throwing all scrapbook worthy items in a big drawer to hopefully pick up again – one day.

My dear husband told me the other night that he was so glad I was organized. I thanked him but in my mind I thought – you have got to be kidding me. I feel guilty by not immediately capturing and organizing my son’s memories. I keep telling myself I am going to organize a neighborhood scrapbook group to make myself keep up catch up.  But hmmmm.....haven't done that either.  There always seems to be something else going on.

Does anyone have any suggestions on how to organize these memories?
This past Friday afternoon I took off work and my son and I met some of my college roommates for lunch and a playdate in the park. They both have kids very close to my son’s age, 3. We had been trying to arrange this date with the kids forever. It seemed like we could never find a date that worked for everyone. When we got to the park it was hot. Well not as hot as it can be in Alabama but hotter than I am used to yet. So we found a nice pavilion where the kids played with bubbles.

Out of the blue my son looks up at the roof of the pavilion and says, “Look Mommy, it is a hexagon.” My friends looked at me and said “Did he just say hexagon?” Yep. I was so proud. Yes I may be a bit biased on my son’s brightness so it was so great for him to say it out loud in front of my friends.

OK, don't hate me.  I just had to brag a little bit.

I have been MIA lately. Fortunately things have turned at work and I have meaningful work to do now thanks to my ex-sister-in-law. And no, I don’t mean that sarcastically. We both had the misfortune of being married to brothers, which we have both divorced now. So we have that common bond and working together never has been an issue at all.

I was catching up on some of my favorite blogs today and skipping over to some favorite blogs of the bloggers I follow. I found this post that really hit home with me. TOY OVERLOAD! I have often joked about my house looking as though Toys-R-Us exploded. At some point after Christmas as I was trying to get all of the toys from the living room to my son’s room it dawned on me that he didn’t play with the toys he had, is he going to play with the new toys? Sure he liked the train set for a couple of weeks. Now it is in a box in his closet. There is a toy chest in his room. It hasn’t been opened in a month. He does play with a simple Thomas the Train and three cars that attach. And he has been inseparable from a dragon from his Happy Meal on Sunday. But what does he play with? A rock, magnets on the refrigerator, a string, the sofa cushions. Mostly he uses his imagination. And that is what I need to encourage. So I am vowing to (A) not pick up that toy at Target just because I think he will like it (which he would for maybe a day) and (B) when I buy a toy try to get things that will encourage imagination. Puzzles, books, simple toys.

Here is a link that I was referring to:

I have been moping about lately about my job situation, which still hasn’t really been resolved but they are finding busy work to keep me occupied. It has occurred to me – why am I letting this define me??? This job is not who I am. Granted, monetarily I need to work but there is no reason for disappointments here to consume my life.

Worrying about the situation isn’t changing a thing, with the exception of the way my pants fit. I wish I was one of those gals who lost weight when they worried. I have always been a burry it with food emotional eater. Plus, those darn Whopper Robins Eggs that are only available at Easter!

So if my work situation is not in my control, what is? My attitude and reaction to things. I can control my choices not to each junk. Plus my husband has inspired me to get in shape for vacation in 59 days. No, it was not a comment he made – he is smarter than that. He wants to have a family portrait made at the beach. I want to wear a white sundress in the picture, so I need to shed the winter and emotional eating weight.

Also, I can control my attitude about life. I still have a job. I have a wonderful family. I have a nice home. I am so blessed. And I need to thank God for this. That is another area I need to improve – my relationship with God. I must admit over the past year there have been many things I have prayed for that didn’t get answered. That is hard to accept. But I know He is still there for me even thought I have put up a wall between us. I saw Beth Moore’s book, Get Out of That Pit, at Wal-Mart yesterday but I didn’t buy it. Has anyone read this book? Any other recommendations?

I am giving myself a kick in the butt and will quit throwing myself a pity party. Eat right, Smile and Thank God!
I went out for Moms Mexican Margarita Movie night with friends in my neighborhood last night. It is so great to get out with girlfriends and cut-up. We had such a blast that we forgot the movie. I looked at my watch and it was 10 minutes past the start time. Oh well, it is more about the company than the movie.

As the conversation went on we were talking about another neighbor who wasn't there (yes I know not very nice, I blame the margaritas) and neighbor N said, "Well, their 6 year old daughter still sleeps with them."

As I was driving home, neighbor T was riding with me and she confessed to me that her son who is 5 still sleeps with her and her husband. I told her I was so glad she told me because my son too sleeps with us.

Yes, I know there are those of you out there who are thinking: What are they thinking????? Well it isn't exactly something planned. When he was an infant Sweet Boy had severe colic for 6-7 months. As a working mom I did what I had to in order to get some sleep. So he slept on my chest. We transitioned his to his bed and shortly after his first birthday we moved. The new house freaked him out - big time. So to bed with us he went.

We've tried from time to time to get him to sleep in his bed, and then I run out of steam and cave. And truth be known, now I've gotten used to him being there. It is so wonderful to snuggle and kiss his sweet cheeks. Time is going so fast. Soon he won't snuggle with mommy. So I have to take advantage of it now.

My point to this post is neighbor T and I were both ashamed to admit in front of the rest that our children sleep with us. There is one thing I have learned as a parent those thing I said I would never do prior to having a child (like having one sleep with me), I now do. And I don't criticize other parent's parenting. So why am I ashamed to admit this? Fear of being judged?

When I got home Sweet Boy comes running to give me hugs and kisses and tell me he missed me. So wonderful. He then said lets go to your car. When I asked him why we needed to, he told me to get the groceries. How sad is my life that the only place my son thinks I go is the grocery store?????

I think no matter how secure we working moms are with returning to work, child care providers, etc. there is still that nagging doubt that raises its ugly head every now and then.

This morning on the way to daycare my son says he doesn’t want to go to school. When asked why he said, cause I don’t. After much prodding he said he didn’t love his friends and they made him sad and cry. Well that hit me right in the gut. I continued to prod as to what his friends did that made him sad. He said they bit and kicked him. Momma Bear in me told him that when they did, he needed to shove them back and then tell the teacher. I also took this opportunity to remind him of his friends that I knew were non-biters and how much he liked playing with them.

Now I know that some of the story may be a bit of three year old embellishment. And I know that this behavior is typical in daycares. But I don’t want my son to dread going to school. One of the kids he mentioned doing the biting is a repeat offender. I don’t want to be one of those mothers but I think my son has the right to go to school without fear.

I am sure some of you who read this are thinking – she told her son to push another child??? My son has always been very timid and shy. I am trying to teach him to stand up to himself. Perhaps telling him to shove another kid probably wasn’t the best solution but Momma Bear was coming out.

So I am looking for advice. How should I handle the three year old bullies?
I know God is trying to teach me a lesson; I am just not a very good student. Patience has never been one of my strong points. My little boy has made me improve my patience greatly. As I wait for him to get in his car seat and he is distracted by every toy, book, and speck of trash in the floor board of my car. As I wait and remind him of every task he needs to do when he goes potty. As I wait for him to focus and finish his meal. But while I am better about adjusting to LPT (Little People Time), it is my life goals that I have issues. As I mentioned in an earlier (OK my only other post) that my work situation is in a bit of turmoil right now. I am waiting on half the building to get back from Spring Break so they can discuss what to do with me.

The second waiting game I am playing is for another baby. My “game plan” was to get pregnant last summer and have another baby this spring. The kids would be three years apart – perfect. Well, got pregnant in July and had a miscarriage in September. I know that baby just wasn’t meant to be. I am ok with it, most of the time. I am sure the end of next month, which would have been the baby’s due date, I won’t be ok.

When I got pregnant with my son it was a surprise – wonderful surprise – but yes a surprise. So we weren’t trying. With the pregnancy I miscarried, I got pregnant the second month. So after I had the miscarriage I thought we’ll wait the suggested three months and try again. I thought I don’t have any troubles getting pregnant, I am a fertile momma. Well five cycles later, no baby. Plus I have been having strange symptoms from ovulation until my period starts. So I went to the doctor this morning to see what my issue is. They are checking hormones, thyroid, etc. But she told me it sounds as though my body and hormones still aren’t back in line from being pregnant and I need to wait. If I am not pregnant in the summer, they will start looking into options to expedite things. And yes I know it is in God’s hands. If I am meant to have another baby it will happen. I know four years between kids isn’t a bad gap. And I know if I don’t have another child I do have a wonderful, healthy son for whom I am grateful. But all of this is not MY plan and I don’t want to wait. I don’t want to have doubts that I will not be able to get pregnant. So it goes back to learning patience. God has His work cut out.